You Need to Know This, or, The "I've Been Sick & This Is All You Get" Post

Mega Men and Emer'gen-C could not keep away the ills of Winter, not even now. It seems the office is a bedpan of dirty virii and icky foul stuff, which invariably found their way to me, giving me the same cold everyone else has had. Probably even you. Thanks a lot.

A video is out. Not even happening. But that's not to say I haven't found some juicy tidbits for you to munch on. Enjoy.

• Tom Cruise eats placenta! Just kidding. But if he did, would you really be surprised?
• Breyers Ice Cream rep: "We didn't tell them to do that. And who's got the dirty mind?"
• God wants Mary J. Blige to wear bling. But hopefully not grillz.